Hey yo! :D
I realised my blog is kind of dead.
But i dont really bother :D
Anyway, went out with minyi today.
We went takashimaya to spent away her
beloved voucher :D
Hahas, i bought two notebooks!
One is chip & dale and the other one is
elmo one :D
But, she bought more things than me. xD
Went KFC to eat, but their food and
service sucks today :X:X
Eat and chatted a lot of personal stuffs too.
After that we walked to plaza sing cause
she wants to buy clothes at pmk.
So yea, we went and she bought one set
with 50% off which only cost like $40?
Is like so cheap larh, and because of that
we decided to go pmk buy clothes again
tomorrow because tomorrow is the last day!
Hahas, shop Shop SHOP! :D:D

Tomorrow buying books also xD
Like FINALLY~! >,<
School reopening real damn soon and plus
first day of school have training x)
Got to really study hard le..
IF not... :/
Kay larh blog until here, BYEbye.

你看的見我打在屏幕的字,
卻看不見我掉在鍵盤上的涙.
把心情放飞吧,
让它飞到“快乐和开心”的世界里吧！
因为再美丽的花朶也會道謝.
失去的东西是不可能回来的,
我已经放弃了.
所谓的幸福，
其实就是心里一擅那的感覺.
是不是道谢的花才最美丽?
是不是失去的东西才最值的去珍惜?
终于明白如果太软弱的人,
最後受傷最深的还是自己.
蝴蝶再美时終还是飛不过海
什么是长大?
是不是痛苦过,
挣扎过,
失望过,
这一切过后,
再若无其事地继续生活?
这时侯,
我长大了,
为生计而奔命,
穿梭在钢筋水泥的世界里.
其实我根本没有找回真正的自己,
愿望会不会实现,
我还没有看见,
我更不知道,
我只能自己努力,
结果才能出现.
IM NOT BEING EMO!

一只风筝一辈子只为一根线冐险.
应为風筝詠遠都不能囄開風,
但風却可以沒有風筝.
就是那麽簡單!

当我決定放棄的那一刻时,
我却哭了.

即使在多的痛苦,
也无法让我大叫出来.
我总是独自享受着压制的快乐,
尽量将所有锋利的,
可以划出血的东西藏好;
可是其實我眞的很痛.

当我闭上眼睛时,
我以为我可以忘记.
可是当我流下泪时,
却骗不了自己.

一个承诺,
在心最需要的时候,
没有兑现,
那就是出卖,
以后再兑现,
已经没什么意义了.

我相信如果时间过去了，
一切都会变得更美丽.
可是如果雨停了,
泪水能把记忆的伤痕洗净嗎?

臉上的快楽別人看得到,
可是心里的傷痛有誰知道?
我假装無所謂其实心早以破碎.
我决定擦幹眼淚,
告訴自己不能哭.
有一种笑未必快乐,
有一种哭未必伤心,
可是有一种感觉欲哭无泪.
是现实太徦還是自己太儍?
所有的難過能隨著氣泡大口吐出嗎?
我在夕陽下的星許願...

♥ 我突然间好想好想好想看日出/日落.

My Reflection;

As i was browsing through my files, i found my resolution for 2007.
I'm kind of forgotten about this resolution that i had made last year.
So yea out of eight, i only completed one i guess... :/


Actually i did this cause debbie told me to do so >,<
But now finally i realise the reason for doing a resolution,
By doing it at the same time will also move forward spiritually.
Maybe this is the reason why i had not been moving forward..
I had been stopping and sometimes instead of moving forward,
I moved backwards..

As i was reflecting how my life was in this 2007.
I realise that God is actually there for me in a lot of situation,
But i neglected Him instead..
One good example is my mum!
I bought her to the magic of love event and after that,
She even wish to visit the church again for service.
And now, she seems more holy than me.. o.o
She even baptised before me!
Not bad right? xD

This year was really a challenging year for me.
There were plenty of ups and downs happening,
Which made me got shaken by it just somehow..
School, family, friends and church.
Were really stressing me out and giving me a headache.
Won't elaborate because it's too long to be written,
Want to know maybe can ask me and i'll tell you? xD

I'm learning, learning how to take and put things down.
Learning how to control my emotions,
And pretend nothing happened in front of others.
Learning how to forget about the past,
And move on with life ahead,
So that i trapped in the past no more xD

So yea, i decided to plan my 2008 resolution.
No one told me to do so actually,
But yea i think i need to do it..

Thinking hard and deep..

Yea indeed it has been a few months that i'm in CHC.. My life had been changing ever since i received Christ no matter which church i went to. I'm happy to see that people around me got impacted by God, its really a wonderful thing. People around me are happy that i continue going church.. But i'm not what you all see from the inside.

Trust? What is it? It's faded away from my dictionary. Trust is just a word to me and it don't mean anything. I used to trust and on fire for Him but as each and everyday that passes, all this had long dropped unexpectedly. I had been pushing myself, pushing myself to go service, cell group meeting, bible study, etc.. For i still held on to the little faith that i had left and because of that, i had been trying, trying to build that faith and trust but..

But i'm really really tired and i mean it. Every time when i'm fallen or shaken off, it's not easy to get back and step into another higher level. One time after another when i was shaken or fallen, it got deeper and harder to get back up. Just like rock climbing, each time you slip off from the tiny stone, it got harder to continue because your energy level is getting lower and lower. Same goes to this. Especially when i fallen or shaken, my faith and trust level dropped too and worst still when my faith and trust level have yet to resume to the acceptable level i fall off again.

It's hard for me to write in words or say in words to explain what i'm experiencing and feeling.. Every time when i was really down and crying, how i wish there's one person standing in front of me to lend me his/her shoulder, comfort me and even pull me up on the spot..

p/s: I know i'm naive but i wishing it to come true..

HOHO. ;D bake cookies today~~~! first time
bake cookies in my life consider not bad larh
still edible xD LOLS! Considering baking my
ginger bread man on thursday but than ah..
Thursday got thanksgiving and i think should
be no training? cause is hari raya.. So yea still
thinking shall i go thanksgiving? uhmmmm...

tomorrow got training >,< i will be dead in
fancy drills i think cause there's a lot of changes
when i didn't go! Waaaa siao liao lor. I hope i
won't make the squad run rounds with riffle :X
Kay larh thats all and yea will not post that
often le cause yea not nothing to blog but yea...

How come my random playlist keep playing worship song in a series
like non stop today? o.o I realise my heart when real numb nowadays
i feel nothing at all when i hear worship songs and even in church..
As day past by and things that had happened in my family makes me
hate my life and even ... my heart this time round is turning really
cold and numb. no more trust no more faith :X letting go and walking
away.. i starting to have doubts in ...

sometimes i really feel like 死了算了.
and i realise that since i dont have that much
money to buy a new phone, without phone life
also not bad because i can become uncontactable...

Today training sucks :XX Met madeline at 7.10am
today and she was late! Lucky met jinxing and we
chated if not.. i'll slaughter you ah! LOLS xD
Had campcraft training from 8.15am to 11.11am..
It was bloody tiring lor. Today 2 AI' s CIs came and
the training was like extra tough? =.= Had pt at the
starting than after that tio punishments. The whole
campcraft training i was like... I can't tie fast at all
lor. Is like the ground was super soft larh, even
softer than the first training we had. Is like cannot
blame us lor, we also wish to tie very fast but things
kept appearing and stopping us from going fast.
What the hell. Plus today format of the flat style abit
change lor and is like we not used to it at all can?!
We need time to get use to it and tie fast also mah.
Because we slow and and obstacles kept appearing
baoxin and i got really frustrated. Is like #$@%$#%
@#$^#^$%&$. @_@ I can only say i really cannot
take it larh and if thurdays training is much much
more worst than this than i don't think i can take it
any longer.. (i almost cried but i hold back my tears.
.) I don't know what happened to me today i keep
feeling giddy and headache when i suddenly do
something but i still endure through the training.
Straight after campcraft training had fancy drills
training. Okay was at least better i think.. Half
of the steps was changed and i don't really know
what was happening actually :XX Okay larh will
blog until here..

p/s: How great, i'm having a fever now ://

Life seems like a drama. Things come and
go plus happening like something impossible.
This is the life i got to live in and it's all planned
the day i was born. There's nothing i can do to
it but to face it and learn to overcome it.
Everyday is a new beginning... (i guess)

The smile that you see, it's not the real me inside...

Yo! Just came back not long ago~ :D Early in
the morning went meeting for the campcraft
shirt design thing and ended super early xD
So we (suling, madeline and baoxin) walked
from library back to northpoint and madeline
and i slacked at macdonald while waiting for
minyi to come~ HOHO. she wore dress today!
Hahas. Chio seah. LOLS ;D

Today madeline is horny! HAhas. She can't stop
thinking slant and we laughed like no tomorrow
like that. LOLS. After that went time zone play
a while after that sent minyi to mrt station than
me and madeline went to play basketball with
benjamin and elbert at khabit there. We played
in the rain. Geeess. It was fun larh though we
didn't play long because was raining very heavily ):

I asked my mum to sponsor me some money for
christmas presents than she told me to bake cookies
and make chocolates. She said she will sponsor all the
cost if i bake cookies and make chocolates but i don't
have so much time larh! xD LOLS. See how things
goes bah cause i still don't know give what to who yet
you know :/ Kay larh i stop here, go buy audition le.

how am i suppose to feel when everything surrounding me is nothing but a
fake disguise . i dont know, i don't know where i belong. i can't stop the rain
from falling. i'm drowning in all these tears i cry when all this nonsenses
happened in my life. i'm stuck in my world long gone and it's hard to reveal
what's going on in my life and how's i feeling deep inside.. it's nothing but a
bitter taste.

Aye how come today people so random and so
many things happened eh? Weird weird one xD
People who don't used to talk to me suddenly
talked to me and within a day a war happened
in somewhere. (cannot tell :X)

Anyway, i'm fine because i still alive you see..
Lols. As for my life, that one ah aiya don't wish
to talk about it because no use also. The truth is
that it's a fact, there's nothing i can do to change
it you see~ Everyday there will be things for me
to think and trouble of.

Hahas. Kay larh i go settle my christmas present
listing le ;D && HOHO, Mr Handsome own me
something~~ ;P

HOHO. i'm back to blog again~
Okay i just realised christmas is arriving in 17 days time!
Like oh my gost? xD
I totally forgot about it you knoww..
So yea i did some listing of people to give presents to just now.
Also cracking my brain juice to think what to buy xD
Hahas. Pray hard that you're in my lists worh~ ;D

Okay i'm plain bored todayy
So i did quizzes to kill my time xD
I also dont know true a not...

Your view on yourself:You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

What type of personality do i have: Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

p/s: Going out to cut hair today ;D

It's you all pushes all this into this state
So let it be!
I had enough of it.
Now this is only a house for me to sleep in
You all don't treat me as your child/sister
Than let it be.
I also don't treat you as my family
Cutting my allowance to see how i die and get a phone,
Hah!
I'll prove you wrong.
I'm already finding way to earn money.
I earn or rob also won't ask money from you.
You want give than give
Dont want give than let it be!
Want divorce than let it be too.
I really tired of hearing it le.
At most i find/rent a place to live in ONLY.
I HATE THIS LIFE.
IT SUCKS.
AND THATS FINAL!

!@$!#%$#^%%$#&$^&^#$
What the hell larh! @_@ Suppose to be a happy
day today but DAME IT. Tio pickpocket while
i was on the way home and there goes my phone~
T_T Fark up larh && worst till is my mum refuses
to buy me a new phone again because this was the
second time i lost my phone.. So now no more
phone but call line what the use? First phone kana
little children take away than second phone spoiled
than now is phone kana pickpocket-ed. Ta ma de.
What in the world is happening? Arggggggg!

DONT BOTHER TO CALL OR
SMS ME. ANYTHING URGENT
NEED TO CONTACT ME JUST
LEAVE A MESSAGE IN MSN
OR CALL MY HOUSE @ (67525845)

我真 的好 想 哭; 我觉得好 无助..

Chunfu
Daphne
Debbie
Jianhui
Madeline
Minyi
N327
Sabrina
Shimin
Shurong
Wainee

October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
March 2010

Image; Deviantart
Edit by; Photoshop 7.0
Done by; Sisi

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥